I don't want to be perfect, just better...

Tuesday, April 26, 2011

Updates on ME: I Quit & I Ain't You or I Took Off My Cape

Found at Qui510
Yes, I quit my job.

It was time.

I was miserable.

I saw no room for growth, no perks, no advancement and no additional money ever coming to me. All I saw in my future was a mountain of work with more being shoveled down on me with my boss/owner of the company standing above me shovel in hand.

Yes, I asked for a raise. Months passed and the response I received was basically "You lucky to still have a job. Just do your work and shut the hell up."

I asked for a title bump, a salary review, a new position description, something. Months have passed and still no response.


To make matters worse, I got a D on a paper. I can count the number of times in my life that I earned a D. I find that truly unacceptable.

I wasn't able to complete my internship with FEMA because I was spending more time at work than taking advantage of the awesome learning opportunity I had. One of my biggest regrets was letting this opportunity slip away.

I wasn't sticking with my diet, nor with my workout routine so I was going backwards in quest to lose weight. I've gained weight instead of lost. I had to check Foursquare to know the last day I was at the gym.

Adding insult to injury, Princess brought home an E on her report card. 

Yes I could have dealt eventually with all those things individually but collectively?

I had to ask myself "Why are you still here? It is obvious that this company cares very little for you. Why are you still giving them your loyalty when it is so ill deserved?" 

My answer to myself came down to the three things I was lacking at my company - Money, Power & Respect. I'll let The Lox and Lil Kim explain it better:






So I made the decision to focus on my life rather than my job. I feel 1000% better and it hasn't been a day.

Since, I quit yesterday I have had varying responses. Former employees of my company have been super supportive. They know the hell I endured from the unorganized business structure that caused me to have to dodge vendors seeking payment, to endless waiting for approval, the backburnering of my ideas, to hurry up and get this shit done because it was due yesterday.

Others who weren't intimate with my work/life situation think this is a joke, or a brilliant negotiating tactic to get a raise, or stupid or half a dozen other responses. I'm actually hoping that by now everyone has read my announcement email.

I think the people who know me well, know I'm not up for game playing except Words With Friends (username blackandbookish) or Trivial Pursuit and board games.

One email that pissed me off was from someone I least expected. The email basically said "why you quit a paying job? Don't you know you have to suffer? I couldn't do something like that, I like to go get my nails done, and my hair needs to look nice."

I wanted to fire an email right back at her "Your nails with a design on every finger are the tackiest shit this side of the Atlantic, you addicted to the creamy crack and obviously some has leaked into your brain if you Think you have to suffer to retain employment. I can rock my afro or whatever style I want and be happy and confident in me and I learned how to color inside the lines in first grade so I can paint my own nails." I didn't and haven't but she got a -50 for that shit. (If you don't know what that means read here.)

Anyhoo, I thought I was Wonder Woman and I'm just a regular woman who needs time and space to recover.

I've been asked by other if I would go back to work there and the answer is maybe... if we could come to an arrangement that I didn't feel jeopardized all the things I am working for...

4 comments:

  1. You go girl! I am greatly jealous of the opportunity you have to move on like this. IMHO, you are right to be watching for yourself and your family. Jobs will come and go, but your sanity and your family will be with you forever.

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  2. I bet you have a weight lifted off of you!

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  3. I do feel as if a huge weight is off my shoulders!

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  4. Been there before. A huge weight should be lifted from your shoulders. The tension should be released from your neck and back. You no longer cringe at the sound of alarm clock going off every morning. Quitting (for the right reasons) is very liberating. I applaud you for taking that step and chucking fear out the window. Now you can concentrate on life and YOU.

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