Image - Curt Clendenin
My maternal grandmother raised me and in spirit I'm her child and no one else's.
In the last two weeks I've had a couple of setbacks in my long, mid range and short term planning. It was during this time that I broke down for about an hour crying, weeping and moaning.
The Hubbster was at work early. OKBF was at work late. I knew @cwattigney, WooWoo and TallGirl were busy. I called my godmother but she was too busy to sit on the phone while I was basically on a crying tangent.
It was during my crying jag that I realized how orphaned I am emotionally especially by my family. I'm sure that if I called one of my eight brothers and sisters that they would listen to me and my problems but as to compassion and understanding...
It was also during this time that I wished my mother and I had the type of relationship were I could call her with my problems because really there was nothing anyone could do but I needed an emotional shoulder to boohoo my eyes out too.
I've always been envious of women that are close with their mothers. TallGirl, WooWoo, @CWattigney and OKBF all have the mothers I wish I had. When something goes down or wrong in their life they have an emotional backup system that is the equivalent of the 101st Airborne or Seal Team Six.
That is a bond that I don't have; the last time I called my mother with a tears in my voice and dilemma in my heart - she didn't offer a listening ear, kind words or even comfort - she basically scolded me, mocked and taunted me.
I vowed then and there after I left our call angry instead of relieved that I would never call her again when I was having a problem.
Who do you call when you hit bottom emotionally?